There will be a last time for everything we do...
Life is a tapestry woven from countless moments, each unique and fleeting. Too often, we drift through our days distracted, lulled by the familiarity of routines and the false expectation of endless time. When we routinize our lives and cling to the illusion of infinite time, we are inevitably pulled out of presence. Some years ago, I discovered a powerful thought exercise that brings greater presence and a deeper appreciation for life. This exercise is known as "The Last Time." It invites us to confront the impermanence of our experience and awaken more deeply to each moment in our lives.
The Last Time exercise is a simple practice in mindfulness. It reminds us to consider the very real possibility that whatever we're doing right now could be the last time we do it—because there will inevitably be a last time for everything. Imagine the real possibility that this could be the last time you hold your child, the last time you speak to your mother, the last time you cuddle your pet, the last time you make love with your partner, the last time you eat your favorite meal or the last time you visit a particular grocery store or go to work.
This exercise isn’t meant to cause anxiety or sadness but rather to heighten our awareness of the present moment. It urges us to savor each experience with the knowledge that our existence, as we know it, is not everlasting—there will be a last time for everything we do.
This exercise has resonated deeply since I first heard about it, and I often contemplate it in my own life. I remember carrying my boys on my shoulders. They were small then, and I could lift them easily, feeling the warmth of their little hands clutching my neck. Now, one is bigger than I am, and those days of carrying them around on my shoulders are gone. When was the last time I carried either of them on my shoulders? I don’t know, but I’m certain that during that last time, I didn’t realize it was the last. Looking back, I could have been more present in that moment, savoring its preciousness. The recognition that every experience can only be done a finite number of times can bring us to a state of deep gratitude where we are not just moving through life but truly experiencing every moment in its fullness.
When engaged in the "Last Time" exercise, we are called to immerse ourselves in the richness of the present. We are encouraged to fully experience all aspects of each moment—each sensation, thought, and emotion—not just to create stronger memories but to truly be present. We are invited to open ourselves up to the entirety of each moment, allowing it to imprint upon us deeply.
Traditionally, this exercise reminds us to open ourselves deeply to life’s fleeting nature. However, I recently discovered an even deeper significance to the exercise. During a recent Heart Sanctuary ayahuasca retreat, as I sat under the vast expanse of the Milky Way, the "Last Time" exercise came to mind. I marveled at the privilege of being there, surrounded by friends I had known for years in a land of breathtaking beauty, wondering if this would be the last time I attended one of these beautiful and heart-opening retreats. It was under those stars when the deeper realization struck me.
In that moment, I realized that the "Last Time" exercise points to an even deeper truth. Yes, it reminds us that this might be the last time we engage in a specific activity or experience a particular person. But as I sat there, I realized that every moment is the last time we experience that exact moment. I will never again sit on that same stool in the same way, looking at the stars from that exact angle, with that particular sequence of thoughts and emotions. This was the first and last time anyone would ever experience that exact configuration of life… Wow, what a gift.
This realization deepened my sense of presence even further. It’s not just about recognizing that this might be the last time we are in a particular place or with certain people but that every single moment is unique and will never happen again. Our lives are a flowing river of "Last Times," each moment passing to the next as soon as it is experienced.
I thought how, in our day-to-day lives, we too often overlook the uniqueness of each moment. We might think of work as monotonous or our commute as routine, but even in these mundane activities, there is the opportunity for profound presence. The specific pattern of light emitted from each pixel of your computer screen, the particular arrangement of every object on your desk, the thoughts and emotions you’re experiencing, and your physical position in space—all of these elements create a moment that has never existed before and will never exist again.
I invite us all to contemplate this mindset and, by doing so, cultivate a deeper awareness of each moment. Ask, "What can I notice? What can I attend to? What can I be most deeply present to?" This perspective allows us to appreciate each moment's infinite complexity and beauty. It reminds us that the present is always changing and that our task is to embrace each moment of existence as fully as possible, recognizing that each moment is precious and impermanent.
Ultimately, the "Last Time" exercise is an invitation to live more fully in every moment. It challenges us to recognize that every moment is a fleeting, once-in-all-of-creation experience. The exercise invites us to be present, to notice, and to fully appreciate the now. For in the ever-changing flow of life, the only constants are impermanence and awareness, and every moment invites us to find the true depth and richness of our existence.